HI. THIS IS A'ALADASH KADRA, RIGHT? I ASSUMED AS MUCH WITH THE EMAIL NAME BUT YOU NEVER KNOW, MAYBE THERE ARE TWO A'ALADASHES FLOATING AROUND HERE. I HEAR YOU'RE THE WOMAN TO TALK TO IF I'M INTERESTED IN A CAREER IN SOCIAL ENFORCEMENT? SERVING THE PUBLIC TRUST, THAT KIND OF THING? MY NAME'S KARKAT VANTAS, I'M ONE OF THE NEW IMPORTS. I WAS TRAINED AND WORKED AS A THRESHECUTIONER BACK HOME. THAT'S SIMILAR TO YOUR POLICE FORCE. SO THAT TYPE OF WORK IS WHAT I'M USED TO AND WHAT I LOVE DOING, AND HONESTLY I DON'T HAVE THE APTITUDE OR INCLINATION TO FIND ANOTHER LINE OF WORK, SO I FIGURE WHAT THE HELL, NO HARM IN ASKING IF YOU'VE GOT ANY OPENINGS IN THE FORCE. OBVIOUSLY I CAN'T PROVIDE WORK REFERENCES OR GLOWING TESTIMONIALS FROM PEOPLE WHO'VE KNOWN ME SINCE I WAS A NEWLY-HATCHED GRUB, BUT I'D BE HAPPY TO SUBMIT TO APTITUDE TESTS OR ANYTHING ELSE YOU NEED. THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION.
[ He is being very polite. This is how you talk to superior officers and also to people you're asking to employ you. ]
[Oh look, one of the newbies is actually contacting her. Aala had been keeping a careful, discreet eye on them since they'd arrived, not sure how she feels about the whole program yet, but this chance to be more hands on is a welcome one. She's a hands on sort of woman.]
I'm the woman. Have to say wasn't thinking I'd be getting anyone interested in this. Get wrenched out of your home and volunteer to join enforcement? Sure you're up for that, bud, don't think of us as the enemy or anything?
There might be an opening for you. Not right now. The stuffed councilmen and council lizards aren't into taking chances, but we could do something here and there and see how it works out. A trial.
Just do me a favor and drop the polite crap. It all goes a lot faster if we aren't ma'am and sir at each other all damn day.
[ Drop the polite? Well, okay then. He can do that! ]
NO OFFENSE, BUT I'M NOT DOING THIS FOR YOU. I DON'T LIKE THIS SITUATION, BUT I CAN PUT MY PERSONAL FEELINGS ASIDE AND GET THE JOB DONE WHEN I NEED TO. THEY TOLD ME WHEN I LANDED GLUTES-FIRST IN THIS HOLE THAT BEING A GOOD CITIZEN AND HELPING OUT GETS US HOME FASTER, AND I HAVE SHIT TO DO THAT NEEDS GETTING BACK TO.
[ Like bringing down his government. ]
SO I FIGURE THERE'S NOT MUCH POINT IN WAITING AND I'D BE WASTING MY TRAINING DOING ANYTHING ELSE, AS WELL AS LETTING MY SKILLS GO RUSTY FOR WHEN I GO BACK. NEITHER OF WHICH SOUNDS VERY APPEALING! ALTERNIA'S DANGEROUS AS SHIT. A TRIAL WORKS FINE, THOUGH. SO WHAT DO I CALL YOU IF WE'RE NOT DOING THE YES-MA'AM-NO-MA'AM CHARADE? A'ALADASH IS A MOUTHFUL I'LL PROBABLY MANGLE IN PRONUNCIATION, DON'T KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT KADRA, AND LIZARD LADY COULD BE HALF THE LIZARD PEOPLE HERE.
Self-interest I could believe. They gave me the same party line about you lot being good boys and girls and you'll get to go home. Lorriswarkin said it personally so they were at least intending on it at the time-- who knows if they'll change their minds.
But I don't want you to be doing this for me. I'm one dumb lizard lady in a long line of police chiefs and there'll be another one after me that they sucker into the job. But this is my city and there's hundreds of thousands here with nowhere else to go. If you aren't cutting out, there isn't a second chance. Got it?
Call me Kadra. My friends call me Aala but we're not friends, eh? Least you have something I can halfway pronounce. [Those damn Chocolina were going to kill her with their Xs and T-L combos and liquid vowels.]
IF THEY CHANGE THEIR MINDS THEN THEY WON'T DESERVE THE FUCKING CONSIDERATION I'VE GIVEN THEM SO FAR, AND I CAN BE A PAIN IN THE ASS TO THEM THEN. FOR NOW, WHY BOTHER? YOU DON'T CUT OFF YOUR SNIFF SPONGE TO SPITE YOUR PAN.
KADRA IT IS. I'D APPRECIATE YOU KEEPING IT TO VANTAS. WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND FOR ME? TELL ME WHAT NEEDS DOING AND I'LL TELL YOU IF I CAN DO IT.
They're politicians. What are you expecting? If the political climate stays as it is right now, you probably don't have anything to worry about.
I might have something in mind, but I need to wait to see if a little birdie reports it first. I'll get back to you. But I hope you don't mind running interference with the dimensionals, because they want me to do all sorts of paperwork to justify getting one of my guys involved with them, and you conveniently don't have any paperwork at all right now.
RUNNING INTERFERENCE IS PART OF THE JOB, THAT'S NO PROBLEM. AND I WON'T LIE, IF YOU'D SHOVED A STACK OF PAPERWORK AT ME FIRST THING I'D HAVE PROBABLY FLIPPED A TABLE AND GONE TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL WITH MYSELF.
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no subject
I HEAR YOU'RE THE WOMAN TO TALK TO IF I'M INTERESTED IN A CAREER IN SOCIAL ENFORCEMENT? SERVING THE PUBLIC TRUST, THAT KIND OF THING?
MY NAME'S KARKAT VANTAS, I'M ONE OF THE NEW IMPORTS.
I WAS TRAINED AND WORKED AS A THRESHECUTIONER BACK HOME. THAT'S SIMILAR TO YOUR POLICE FORCE. SO THAT TYPE OF WORK IS WHAT I'M USED TO AND WHAT I LOVE DOING, AND HONESTLY I DON'T HAVE THE APTITUDE OR INCLINATION TO FIND ANOTHER LINE OF WORK, SO I FIGURE WHAT THE HELL, NO HARM IN ASKING IF YOU'VE GOT ANY OPENINGS IN THE FORCE.
OBVIOUSLY I CAN'T PROVIDE WORK REFERENCES OR GLOWING TESTIMONIALS FROM PEOPLE WHO'VE KNOWN ME SINCE I WAS A NEWLY-HATCHED GRUB, BUT I'D BE HAPPY TO SUBMIT TO APTITUDE TESTS OR ANYTHING ELSE YOU NEED.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION.
[ He is being very polite. This is how you talk to superior officers and also to people you're asking to employ you. ]
no subject
I'm the woman. Have to say wasn't thinking I'd be getting anyone interested in this. Get wrenched out of your home and volunteer to join enforcement? Sure you're up for that, bud, don't think of us as the enemy or anything?
There might be an opening for you. Not right now. The stuffed councilmen and council lizards aren't into taking chances, but we could do something here and there and see how it works out. A trial.
Just do me a favor and drop the polite crap. It all goes a lot faster if we aren't ma'am and sir at each other all damn day.
no subject
NO OFFENSE, BUT I'M NOT DOING THIS FOR YOU.
I DON'T LIKE THIS SITUATION, BUT I CAN PUT MY PERSONAL FEELINGS ASIDE AND GET THE JOB DONE WHEN I NEED TO.
THEY TOLD ME WHEN I LANDED GLUTES-FIRST IN THIS HOLE THAT BEING A GOOD CITIZEN AND HELPING OUT GETS US HOME FASTER, AND I HAVE SHIT TO DO THAT NEEDS GETTING BACK TO.
[ Like bringing down his government. ]
SO I FIGURE THERE'S NOT MUCH POINT IN WAITING AND I'D BE WASTING MY TRAINING DOING ANYTHING ELSE, AS WELL AS LETTING MY SKILLS GO RUSTY FOR WHEN I GO BACK. NEITHER OF WHICH SOUNDS VERY APPEALING! ALTERNIA'S DANGEROUS AS SHIT.
A TRIAL WORKS FINE, THOUGH.
SO WHAT DO I CALL YOU IF WE'RE NOT DOING THE YES-MA'AM-NO-MA'AM CHARADE?
A'ALADASH IS A MOUTHFUL I'LL PROBABLY MANGLE IN PRONUNCIATION, DON'T KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT KADRA, AND LIZARD LADY COULD BE HALF THE LIZARD PEOPLE HERE.
no subject
But I don't want you to be doing this for me. I'm one dumb lizard lady in a long line of police chiefs and there'll be another one after me that they sucker into the job. But this is my city and there's hundreds of thousands here with nowhere else to go. If you aren't cutting out, there isn't a second chance. Got it?
Call me Kadra. My friends call me Aala but we're not friends, eh? Least you have something I can halfway pronounce. [Those damn Chocolina were going to kill her with their Xs and T-L combos and liquid vowels.]
no subject
KADRA IT IS. I'D APPRECIATE YOU KEEPING IT TO VANTAS. WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND FOR ME? TELL ME WHAT NEEDS DOING AND I'LL TELL YOU IF I CAN DO IT.
no subject
I might have something in mind, but I need to wait to see if a little birdie reports it first. I'll get back to you. But I hope you don't mind running interference with the dimensionals, because they want me to do all sorts of paperwork to justify getting one of my guys involved with them, and you conveniently don't have any paperwork at all right now.
no subject
AND I WON'T LIE, IF YOU'D SHOVED A STACK OF PAPERWORK AT ME FIRST THING I'D HAVE PROBABLY FLIPPED A TABLE AND GONE TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL WITH MYSELF.
no subject
Go take care of this. Tell me how it goes.
no subject